Now That Explains a Lot: The Hidden Reasons Revealed

I’ve been trying different ways to encourage the kids to help keep the house tidier. I was getting tired of stepping on toys and shuffling aside scattered bionicles to find a seat on the couch. I think I finally found a semi-working plan: create zones. Each child now has a specific area to care for. Liam is responsible for the living room. Aidan takes the dining room. Ty had the dishwasher for a while (that changed today—more on that in a bit). Leif is in charge of the shoes. Rowan’s role is to sit out of the way in a chair with a book while we clean.

Today, Ty volunteered to clean the mudroom. He carefully moved the shoes away from the wall, swept, and lined them up neatly. He brushed off the dogs’ bean bags and put them against the other wall, swept the rest of the floor, and even used the Swiffer (the main reason I keep the thing). Then he called me to inspect his work. I praised him enthusiastically, which drew his brothers over to see what the fuss was about. They were impressed by Ty’s effort, but secretly calculating whether it helped or hurt their standing that their six-year-old brother had just outdone them on cleaning. They offered lukewarm congratulations and wandered off—everyone except Leif.

Leif planted his hands on his hips, paced across the mudroom, turned to me with a very serious, slightly hostile look and declared, “Dis is not good for my nerves.”

Mom: “Did you just say this isn’t good for your nerves?”

Leif: “Yes. Dis is bad. Bad for da nerves!”

Mom: “What is bad for your nerves?”

Leif: “Da clean. Da clean is bad for my nerves. It is not right.”

Mom: “How can the clean be bad for your nerves? It’s good for Mommy’s nerves.”

Leif (exasperated): “Clean is bad for kids’ nerves, Mom. Dey likes dirt and dey likes to play. Dat is good for their nerves.”

Well, that explains quite a bit around here. If Leif is right, it also means my children’s mental health is in good shape—at least according to their own standards.